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A Random
SCIFI.radio story

Earth unravels the secrets of the universe, rewriting the laws of reality but only for red headed people who understand us all too well even though they can all do credible singing impressions of Ethel Merman who derive their sustainance by a slap to the side of the head with a large fish but one cunning young man somehow convinces them that people are okay and they are turned into weird rocks that all look suspiciously like either Elvis or Madonna, but nobody can agree on which one it is.
The End.