Good Omens are on everyone’s lips this week. The Amazon Prime series by the same name, written by Neil Gaiman from the book by the same name that he co-wrote with Sir Terry Pratchett, captures everyone’s attention. It stars Michael Sheen and David Tennant, and it’s already released, so if you have Amazon Prime, you can go binge-watch it.

The book’s full title was Good OmensThe Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch, and was written by Pratchett and Gaiman and published in 1990. It’s self-referential. Agnus Nutter’s book figures prominently in the story as a “macguffin”, the thing that everybody in the story wants, and upon which everything hinges – or becomes unhinged, depending on one’s point of view.

The book is the world’s only accurate book of prophecies.

According to The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes NutterWitch (the world’s only completely accurate book of prophecies, written in 1655, before she exploded), the world will end on a Saturday. Next Saturday, in fact. Just before dinner.

So the armies of Good and Evil are amassing, Atlantis is rising, frogs are falling, tempers are flaring. Everything appears to be going according to Divine Plan. Except a somewhat fussy angel and a fast-living demon — both of whom have lived amongst Earth’s mortals since The Beginning and have grown rather fond of the lifestyle—are not actually looking forward to the coming Rapture.

And someone seems to have misplaced the Antichrist . . .

Before you watch the video, pause the SCIFI.radio music stream. You’ll find the control at the upper right, in a little box labeled “Listen Now”.

This unholy a cappella tribute was written to remember and celebrate the moment when The Chattering Order of St Beryl realized their true purpose, to switch the new born baby Antichrist with the baby of an American Ambassador. Armed with privilege and education, he would be protected till he recognized his true power and issued in the End Times with devastating abandon. This is a song about love for a new infant and for a new leader who is yet to unleash his full potential. Hopefully, the Dark Lord forgives them for using a pacifier ?. The Chattering Order of St Beryl are new to music videos and insisted that it be instilled with as much pop culture references as possible. Those who find them all will be damned for all eternity. Awomen. (lyrics below.)

About the Chattering Order of St. Beryl

Pulled from the pages of Sir Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman’s novel-turned-series Good Omens, The Chattering Order of St. Beryl are an order of nuns dedicated to emulating Christian martyr St. Beryl of Krakow, and whose members are commanded to chatter, natter, and rabbit about every last little thing that comes into their heads for every second of every waking hour. Except of course on Tuesday afternoons, for half an hour, when the nuns are permitted to shut up and, if they wish, to play table tennis.

LYRICS

Our evil prayers were answered by the coming of our Lord
He doesn’t have the teensy little hoofies that we thought
He’s blonde and cute and handsome like a little English Lord
But his evil will emerge!

Cheeky, cheeky little Antichrist.
Naughty, naughty baby Antichrist.
Squishy, squishy baby Antichrist.
That brand new baby smell!

He’ll be raised Americano, learning accent posh and neat,
Son of privilege to manipulate the people that he meets.
The weakened world will crumble ‘neath the claws upon his feet
His day will soon be nigh!

He was just a little babe when Master Crowley brought him here.
He didn’t have the little sixes neatly etched behind his ear.
He had a little smile and the most tushy wushy rear.
That brand new baby smell

Cheeky, cheeky little Antichrist.
Naughty, naughty baby Antichrist.
Squishy, squishy baby Antichrist
That brand new baby smell.

What kind of baby diapers should the Lord of Darkness wear?
Theresa knitted booties from the mane of a dead mare.
Will the Lord forgive us if we use a pacifier?
Dark Lord we’ll do our best!

He’s the cutest little cheeky from his lashes to his toes.
His eyes are lit with fire like the future of his foes.
His widdle golden curls will crown the throne he over throws
That brand new baby smell!

SCIFI Radio Staff
SCIFI Radio Staff

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