A Random

SCIFI.radio story

Earth is chosen as the final battleground for an intergalactic war between two microscopic species who are friendly but incomprehensible even though they can all do credible singing impressions of Ethel Merman who tend to stutter under pressure when confronted by a bunch of kids playing disco music on boom boxes but a priest tells them about the God and they are turned into weird rocks that all look suspiciously like either Elvis or Madonna, but nobody can agree on which one it is.
The End.