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A Random
SCIFI.radio story

Earth becomes the subject of a cosmic reality TV show for ferrets who understand us all too well even though they can all do credible singing impressions of Ethel Merman and might be overpowered by a crowd of people with pitchforks and torches , but scientists create a new weapon which turns them into weird rocks.
The End.
but they die from catching the common cold.
The End.