A Random

SCIFI.radio story

Earth is chosen as the final battleground for an intergalactic war between two microscopic species who are friendly but incomprehensible and might be overpowered by a bunch of Elvis impersonators but one cunning young man somehow convinces them that people are okay and they are turned into weird rocks that all look suspiciously like either Elvis or Madonna, but nobody can agree on which one it is.
The End.