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A Random
SCIFI.radio story

Earth falls under the spell of a cosmic enchantment, casting the world into sentient vats of melted caramel who understand us all too well even though they smell really bad and cannot be destroyed by the army, navy, air force, space force and/or marines but a priest tells them about the God and they are turned into weird rocks that all look suspiciously like either Elvis or Madonna, but nobody can agree on which one it is.
The End.