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SCIFI.radio story

Earth falls under the spell of a cosmic enchantment, casting the world into sentient vats of melted caramel who are friendly but incomprehensible even though they all do bad impressions of William Shatner and might be overpowered by a bunch of kids playing disco music on boom boxes , but scientists create a new weapon which turns them into weird rocks.
The End.
but they die from catching the common cold.
The End.