A Random

SCIFI.radio story

Earth becomes sentient and begins eating other planets who want to plug us into a power grid and use us as living batteries even though they can all do credible singing impressions of Ethel Merman and cannot be destroyed by the army, navy, air force, space force and/or marines but a priest tells them about the God and they form a rock band and tour the galaxy, becoming interstellar celebrities.
The End.